The BigTalk Podcast

Episode 118 - The Roles We Play, and the Shadows Beneath Them

What if the woman you've become is only part of the psychological story? After more than two decades of working with women, I've become increasingly interested in how the roles we learn early in life can become deeply embedded in our adult identities. The capable one. The strong one. The responsible one. The good one. The independent one. Eventually, we can become so good at playing these roles that we stop recognising them as adaptations at all. We simply call them "personality". But there's a deeper question sincere Shadow Works asks of us: What had to be left out in order for you to become this woman? In this episode, I explore the relationship between identity, adaptation and Shadow, including why we can become psychologically invested in the very roles that exhaust us, why our strengths can sometimes become defences, and how the parts we've learned to suppress may contain qualities we now need to reclaim. I'll also bring this into the realities of adult life: relationships, leadership, business, visibility, creativity and the strange moments when the identity that once served us begins to feel increasingly constraining. Sincere Shadow work is about seeing what's been left out. ... and sometimes, that's where the most interesting parts of you begin to emerge. ... Shadow Medicine is my 6-week live experience for women who are ready to go beneath the surface of identity, visibility and self-expression and begin working with the parts of themselves they've learned to keep out of view. Learn more about Shadow Medicine → https://www.amandadavies.co/shadow-medicine Correction: We start September 14 (not 7th as mentioned in the episode).

Episode 117 - The World Wants Your Voice. Your Family Taught You Silence.

We are living through one of the greatest shifts in human communication in history. Think back to the "good old days" where very few people were required to become public voices. There was a time when your work could speak for itself, and your expertise could largely remain within your community or workplace. Frankly, you could live a meaningful life without ever having to build an audience! Today, that’s no longer the case. Therapists have podcasts and audiences. Coaches have newsletters. Professionals have personal brands. Entrepreneurs are expected to become thought leaders. We are living in a new visibility economy, but there is a hidden tension we rarely talk about... The technological world has changed way faster than our psychology has. We are being asked to become more visible, more expressive and more public than ever before... yet many of us are still carrying old internal rules about what it means to be seen. Rules we learned in childhood: Don’t be too much. Don’t make a fuss. Don’t expose what happens here. Don’t outshine others. Don’t challenge the system. So here we are, expected to move at the pace of the modern world inside of a culture that demands full visibility... with nervous systems (and shadow systems) built for compliance and the smallness of our family conditioning. ... and your business is the place where these two worlds collide. This this episode, I investigate why so many accomplished women still struggle with visibility, and how stepping forward can activate old patterns around belonging and safety. We explore: - The six cultural shifts that have transformed visibility from an optional choice, into the defining psychological challenge of our time (and why our nervous systems are still catching up)! - How the old rules we inherited around belonging, safety and self-expression continue to shape the way we show up publicly. - Why brilliant women can spend years doing inner work and still struggle to be fully seen. - How the parts of ourselves we learned to suppress may actually hold our greatest creativity, authority, power, and impact. If you have ever wondered why being seen feels both exciting and exposing... Why you can be highly skilled yet struggle to fully step forward... This conversation is for you. See you inside!

Episode 116 - The Crisis Beneath the Mental Health Crisis

We live in a time of unprecedented psychological understanding. We know about trauma, attachment, nervous systems, emotional regulation, and mental health more than any generation before us. ... and yet, something curious is happening. Despite all of this insight, many people are quietly struggling with a deep sense of disconnection from themselves, their relationships and from life itself. Of course, the world around us feels chaotic... Traditional meaning-structures are crumbling... Anxiety is rising... Loneliness is on the increase. But beneath the surface of outwardly-functioning lives, there's a question on the lips of many that's becoming harder to ignore: "Is this really it?" In this episode, we explore a different way of understanding what is happening beneath the surface of modern life. Because while we have become incredibly fluent in understanding what is "wrong" with us and the world at large, we have lost fluency in a more ancient question: :: "What is trying to emerge through us?" This conversation explores the idea that many of the experiences we label as burnout, confusion, emotional intensity, or dissatisfaction may in fact be signals. Signals that a life is beginning to outgrow the identity that has been carrying it. We also explore why so many people are unconsciously searching for meaning through new pathways such as spirituality, astrology, depth psychology, shadow work, and altered states of consciousness, and what this reveals about the deeper hunger of our time. At the heart of this episode is a simple but confronting possibility: What is often experienced as emotional or psychological disturbance may also reflect an underlying process of soul-emergence. When viewed through that lens, the focus subtly shifts from "healing what's wrong" to questions of "who am I becoming"? ... Final Places Remain: Become a Psychodynamic Coach - Class starts 22nd June. - $1500 in savings through our Early Bird promotion Discover more here: https://www.psychodynamiccoachinginstitute.com/certification

Episode 115 - Why So Many Coaches Secretly Don't Want To Be "Coaches"

There’s a strange tension happening inside the coaching industry right now. On one hand, more people than ever are entering the space because they genuinely want to help others transform. But on the other hand… many practitioners secretly feel disconnected from the very identity they’ve stepped into. Because somewhere along the way, coaching became associated with performance. Scripts. Personal branding. High-energy motivation. Surface-level empowerment. Formulaic transformation. And for many people - especially those drawn to psychology, spirituality, shadow work, Jungian thought, emotional depth and human complexity - something about that feels profoundly incomplete. In this episode, we explore: * Why so many coaches feel disillusioned with modern coaching culture * The hidden embarrassment some practitioners feel around the word “coach” * The difference between real transformation and motivational performance * Why depth-oriented practitioners crave psychological grounding * How the industry often bypasses the unconscious entirely * The growing hunger for work that feels intellectually serious, emotionally honest and soul-deep This conversation is for the people who know they were never meant to do surface-level work. The people who have always been fascinated by the psyche, by patterns, by shadow, by meaning, by what lives underneath behaviour. And perhaps most importantly: the people who have always wondered if there’s another way to practice transformational work altogether. ... EXPLORE DEPTH-COACHING: Early Bird Enrollment for the June cohort of the Psychodynamic Coach Academy is now open with $1500 in savings on offer for a limited time. Discover more here: https://www.psychodynamiccoachinginstitute.com/certification

Episode 114 - Self Improvement and the Missing Map of the Psyche

Are you healing… or just polishing the personality? Much of modern self-improvement focuses on behaviour change, mindset, habits, emotional regulation, or becoming a “better version” of your socially-conditioned self. But what happens when transformation work never moves beyond the surface of the psyche? In this episode, we explore the deeper unconscious dynamics that shape behaviour, resistance, identity, visibility, self-sabotage, and transformation itself, and why many coaches and practitioners are working with an incomplete map of the psyche. We explore: - why self-improvement often plateaus - the unconscious meaning behind “self-sabotage” - why awareness alone doesn’t necessarily create change - spiritual and somatic bypassing - the difference between adaptation and integration ... and why so much transformation work unintentionally becomes "personality polishing" rather than deep psychological change .... Explore the Psychodynamic Coach Academy: Early Bird Enrolment is now open for our upcoming cohort starting on 22 June. - Save $1500 - Secure over $3000 in bonuses - Limited spots available Discover more here: https://www.psychodynamiccoachinginstitute.com/certification