The Beaverton Weekly Report

The Kids Are All Banned From Social Media

"Surely no 15 year old is clever enough to download a VPN". Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre and special guest John Batt of @canada.gov.ca) talk about how banning social media for kids is way easier than regulating it for everyone, the excitement/concern surrounding a World Cup in Trump's America, and Smith and Poilievre finally coming out against Alberta Separatism. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discovers the worst way to churn butter. If you'd like an Extended Cut that also talks about Bari Weiss' wreaking havoc at 60 Minutes, check us out on Patreon.

The Liberals Take Manhattan

"'Technical recession' sounds like something a guy at a bar would mansplain to me, before asking me to pay for the drink he offered to buy for me." Ian and the Panel (Clare Blackwood, Nile Séguin and special guest Jan Caruana - Because News, The Next Step) talk about Mark Carney's totally technical recession and trip to NYC, Elon's SpaceX IPO that is now in everyone's retirement savings, and what's good out in British Columbia. Then, the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discusses New York Mayor Mamdani's most adorable executive order. If you'd like an Extended Cut that discusses poor ticket sales for the FIFA World Cup in North America, check us out on Patreon [http://patreon.com/thebeaverton].

Marco's Cuban Grudge

"After the Iran War went so poorly, they needed an easy win - a palooka, to get their stats back up." Ian and the Panel (Megan MacKay, Nile Séguin and special guest Clare Belford - 22 Minutes, JFL) talk about Danielle Smith's premature referendum announcement, Trump unleashing Marco Rubio on Cuba, and whether Ian and Nile are betas in the Manosphere. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discusses potty humour in both Ottawa AND France. If you'd like an Extended Cut that also looks at how hard it is to make TV and film in Canada, check us out on Patreon.

MOU 2: This Time It's Pipeline

"Can't wait for Memorandum Of Understandings Part III: Trudeau's Revenge." Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Nile Seguin and Clare Blackwood) break down the Pentagon abandoning the Joint Board On Defence we all knew about it before this, the new MOU between Canada and Alberta, and Danielle Smith plowing ahead on an Independence Referendum despite a Court Order. Then the Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discovers the best reason not to report for Military Service. If you'd like an Extended Cut that also looks at Carney's new war on the environment, check us out on Patreon.

Hantavirus is the COVID of Swine Flu's

"You're gonna bite the hand that feeds you under the table." Ian is joined by two special guests, Andrew Ivimey (Talk From Superheroes, CBS's "Boston Blue") and Rob Ito (The Beaverton website) to discuss hantavirus cruise ships, Manitoba's youth social media ban, and Hungarian authoritarianism being exported abroad. Then The Approximately 10 Minute Long Quiz discovers Quebec's most cromulent cultural treasure. If you'd like an Extended Cut that also breaks down gas prices being too damn high, check us out on Patreon.