Ep. 23 - Stop Over-Explaining and Start Leading: Communication Science with Jen Nonn-Murphy
Summary
Have you ever walked away from a high-stakes meeting or a sales call realizing you spent the entire time speaking in circles? In this episode, Liz and Sarah sit down with Jen Nonn-Murphy, a licensed speech-language pathologist and CEO coach who specializes in the brain science of communication.
Jen explains why smart, capable women often fall into the "over-explaining trap" and how cognitive overload—juggling value propositions alongside everyday mental loads like family schedules—can lead to rambling and lost confidence. Jen shares actionable, science-backed formulas to help leaders find their "grit," stop apologizing for their success, and start leading with clarity.
Key Topics
* The Pathology of Over-Explaining: Understanding why our brains hit "working memory" limits during high-pressure conversations.
* The "What, Why, Next" Framework: A repeatable 3-step formula to organize thoughts in real-time.
* The Power of the Pause: Why a 2–3 second silence is your most assertive leadership tool.
* The Goldilocks Dilemma: Navigating the fine line between being seen as "too soft" (a supporter) and "too aggressive" (not collaborative).
* Creating Supportive Cultures: Lessons from Silicon Valley on supporting other women’s voices and having tough, "clear is kind" conversations.
Action Items & Takeaways
* Practice with Frameworks: Use "What, Why, Next" to structure your business pitch or service descriptions to avoid circular talking.
* Anchor Your Practice: Link your communication practice to daily habits, like brushing your teeth or your morning commute, to build muscle memory.
* Utilize the "Power Pause": Give your brain space to process a question before jumping in to avoid "railroading" the conversation.
* Audit Your Tone: Strip away qualifiers like "I was thinking maybe" and replace them with decisive language paired with a collaborative tone.
* AI as a Thought Partner: Use AI to help draft communication frameworks, but ensure you maintain your human connection and authenticity.
Chapters
* [00:18] Sisterhood & Spring: College updates and life "life-ing".
* [02:38] The Over-Explaining Trap: Why we struggle to own our value.
* [10:06] Meet Jen Nonn-Murphy: From pediatric speech therapy to CEO coaching.
* [13:10] Brain Science: Working memory and cognitive overload in sales.
* [17:36] Tool #1: The "What, Why, Next" Framework (Live Practice).
* [22:42] AI in Communication: Using technology as a thought partner.
* [27:26] Tool #2: Pause, Then Speak.
* [31:41] The Goldilocks Dilemma: Assertive vs. Aggressive communication.
* [36:06] Supporting Women: A story on salary negotiation and first offers.
* [42:27] Shifting from Selling to Guiding: Advice for creative entrepreneurs.
* [45:11] The Gritty Journey: Lonesome Dove and prioritizing the "One Thing".
Guest Links
* Website: CCSpeechCoach.com [https://www.google.com/search?q=https://CCSpeechCoach.com] (Take the Communication Self-Rating Scale!).
* Instagram: @clear_confident_coach [https://www.google.com/search?q=https://www.instagram.com/clear_confident_coach].
* LinkedIn: Jen Nonn-Murphy [https://www.google.com/search?q=https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennonnmurphy/].
Keywords
Communication Science, Female Entrepreneurs, Leadership Coaching, Speech Pathology, Cognitive Overload, Creative CEO, Sales Conversations, Women in Business, Assertive Communication, CEO Sisters Road Trip.
Want to learn more about what working with Liz looks like? Head to Your Business Matters [https://www.yourbusinessmatters.dev] to schedule a Discovery call with her