Fear Free Childbirth Podcast with Alexia Leachman

Anxiety in pregnancy

anxiety in pregnancy [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/anxiety-FB.jpg] [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/anxiety-FB.jpg] Anxiety in pregnancy is currently estimated to affect around 15% of women. Through my work in supporting women in preparing for birth and pregnancy, anxiety is something that I see a lot and, dare I say, I think the numbers are probably higher. When women are feeling fearful around aspects of their pregnancy or birth it can trigger feelings of anxiety, but these feelings are known to fluctuate through pregnancy. Anxiety in pregnancy has been shown to peak in both the first and the third trimester (1). HOW ANXIETY IN PREGNANCY AFFECTS BIRTH OUTCOMES From the evidence available (2) we know that pregnancy anxiety not only affects pregnant women’s health but also has an impact on labour outcomes. Anxiety in pregnancy can affect the likelihood of things such as * preterm delivery * prolonged labour * caesarean birth, * low birth weight When you combine these potential outcomes with those that may arise as a result of fear, it’s clear that helping women to deal with fear and anxiety in pregnancy needs to be an important focus if we’re to improve birth outcomes for women. I’ve been supporting women in overcoming their fear for many years now, particularly those with tokophobia, and I’ve enjoyed some incredible success rates. Success rates that are apparently impossible. I was once told off on Twitter by a midwife specialising in tokophobia for suggesting that it’s possible to overcome tokophobia. “… [I] shouldn’t raise women’s hopes like that because they can’t. They just end up having c-sections.”. That may well be the case, but a positive c-section birth experience that is empowering for the woman is a world apart from the c-section that the woman dreads and feels anxious and terrified throughout. That’s when I realised that I needed to get some evidence behind my Fearless Birthing method [https://fearless-birthing.com/fearless-birthing-method/]. Without it, I wouldn’t be able to get birth professionals and healthcare providers to take my work seriously. And that in turn would limit the women able to benefit from the success I’m achieving reducing strong fears and anxieties. So, that’s what I set out to do. COLLABORATING WITH THE UNIVERSITY OF NOTTINGHAM I joined forces with the University of Nottingham Psychology Department [https://www.nottingham.ac.uk/psychology/welcome-to-psychology.aspx] to explore the possibility of collaborating on a research project to evaluate my Fearless Birthing method [https://fearless-birthing.com/fearless-birthing-method/]. This is when I first met Dr. Megan Barnard. Dr. Barnard specialises in anxiety and so exploring anxiety in pregnancy was a good fit for her area of research. So we set out to design a study that would enable us to answer the question: can women reduce their anxieties and fears during pregnancy using a self-paced online programme? CAN WE REDUCE ANXIETY IN PREGNANCY? After many iterations and submissions to the Ethics Board, we got the green light. So I’m delighted to say that there is currently a study underway which aims to evaluate the effectiveness of the Fearless Birthing method [https://fearless-birthing.com/fearless-birthing-method/] in helping women to reduce their anxiety and fear during pregnancy. Given, Dr. Barnard’s expertise in anxiety, I thought it would be a great idea for us to have a conversation about anxiety in pregnancy so that we could all learn more about anxiety. But even more of a reason is this; Dr. Barnard is now currently pregnant. When we started working together, her interest in our work was purely professional. Now that she is experiencing some of the anxieties that we are researching, she has a unique insight into our project which I just wanted to ask her about. A CONVERSATION WITH DR. MEGAN BARNARD One thing that stood out for me from our conversation was that Dr. Barnard was saying that anxiety could strike anyone during pregnancy; you don’t already need to be someone who suffers from it to be affected by it during pregnancy. Dr. Barnard also explained how much pregnancy has bought about a very human reaction to her pregnancy. Even though she studies and researches anxiety – and so is very knowledgeable on it – that doesn’t mean that she isn’t succumbing to it. And I think that is something we can all learn from. We might think that we have things covered, that we ‘know’, but that doesn’t stop our emotions from wading in and causing chaos. This is why I think all women need access to tools that can help them to reduce their anxiety and fear, because it really can happen to anyone, at any point during a pregnancy. And given that anxiety peaks the first and third trimesters, it’s important to have access to this kind of support from early on during your pregnancy. This is one point that Dr Barnard makes during our conversation. Typically women sign up to ante-natal classes late in their pregnancy but in fact, Dr Barnard suggests that women seek emotional and mental support much earlier on during their pregnancy. She talks about the negative impact of having the anxious thoughts ruminating throughout the pregnancy and how it’s better to address these as early on as possible. ANXIETY IN PREGNANCY STUDY – WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE PART? If you’re interested in taking part then this is who we’re looking for; * Must be between 12-16 weeks pregnant when beginning the study. * Must be at least 18 years old. * Must be able to speak and read fluent English. * Must be a UK resident. You can either apply to take part here [https://www.callforparticipants.com/study/H3HPJ/the-effects-of-intervention-duration-on-emotion-appraisals-during-pregnancy] or you can contact Dr Megan Barnard directly here [Megan.Barnard1@nottingham.ac.uk] ABOUT DR MEGAN BARNARD I am a Teaching Associate at the University of Nottingham’s School of Psychology, having received my PhD in Psychology in 2017. When I am not teaching students, I am interested in conducting research on the impact that anxiety has in the real world? In other words, does it stop us from doing the things we want to do, and how can we relieve some of that anxiety in order to improve our wellbeing? I have looked into the effects on anxiety within areas such as transportation and cyberpsychology, and am now working with Alexia to see if psychological interventions can reduce levels of anxiety and depression during pregnancy. SOURCES 1. Research by Lee et al. (2007) and Teixeira, Figueiredo, Conde, Pacheco, and Costa (2009) revealed a varied prevalence of pregnancy anxiety at different trimesters of pregnancy with high levels in first and third trimesters. 2. Catov et al., 2010, Hernandez-Martinez et al., 2011, Lobel et al., 2008, Rauchfuss and Maier, 2011.

Thomas Verny, Father of Prenatal Psychology

prenatal psychology [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/Verny-_-ALELEA-Facebook-1200-x-628.jpg] Prenatal psychology is an area of psychology that looks at the psychological changes that women go through from conception to postpartum. If you’re going to better understand your fears and anxieties during pregnancy then I think understanding prenatal psychology is pretty crucial. The journey to motherhood is one of massive change for a woman and is often accompanied by fear, insecurity, and stress. There is so much that could go wrong: preterm birth, an especially traumatic birth, problems breastfeeding, problems bonding with the baby, miscarriage, problems conceiving… gosh the list goes on! HOW PRENATAL PSYCHOLOGY CAN HELP But mamas-to-be can handle their fears by drawing on ideas from prenatal psychology. Prenatal psychology can give you psychological resources for whatever may come your way: grief after a miscarriage, complicated parenting issues, bonding with their child, etc.For me, the biggest thing I took away from prenatal psychology was getting to grips with the idea that I could consider my unborn baby as a human being from my third trimester. This represented quite a shift in my thinking and my approach to pregnancy. Once you accept that you’re carrying another human being who is able to listen, feel and hear around with you while your pregnant, then it invites some changes to your behaviour.> “By the end of the second trimester, the unborn child is a sensing, feeling and sensible (and remembering) human being.” Thomas Verny During our chat I put these questions to Thomas; * What should a mother focus on during her pregnancy to improve the likelihood of a positive birth outcome? * What can a mother do during pregnancy to nurture the baby? * Can babies understand what their mothers are thinking when pregnant? * Do babies pick up on the emotional journey of the mother during pregnancy? * What are some causes of tokophobia [the extreme fear of pregnancy/birth]? * Does the type of birth we have – vaginal unassisted, forceps, c-section etc – have any psychological impact on us? As you can see from these questions, they have the potential to reveal some fascinating answers, and Thomas doesn’t disappoint. I was in heaven! Thomas starts by sharing some key factors that pregnant women should focus on during pregnancy to improve the likelihood of a positive birth outcome. These include; 1. A desire for a child 2. Relationship with her partner 3. Relationship with one’s own mother 4. Your own birth Some people might be surprised at these because they are not things we tend to see in the typical birth prep lists alongside the more expected items like nutrition exercise or birth education. Thomas shares some interesting perspectives that are definite food for thought. Prenatal psychology [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/Pinterest_-_thomas_Verny_-_breech-200x300.jpg]We chat about the importance of tuning into our babies and how best to do that and Thomas shares some ways that mamas-to-be can nurture baby during pregnancy. We also discuss fertility and how stress affects fertility. HOW OUR BIRTH TYPE AFFECTS OUR THINKING The bit that I think you’ll love though is what he has to say about our birth type, and what kind of mental and emotional patterns they can lay in place. Things like; Forceps birth – Pain in the neck is a common theme for them. At times of stress, they will likely have pain in the head or shoulders. C-section birth – Common thoughts will include “I can’t make it on my own”, “If I’m in a tight place, people will come to my rescue” Breech birth – They are the most hard headed of people “It’s my way or the highway”. They don’t want to conform. So, as you can see, this really is a fascinating chat and one that I think could really shift your perspective of your pregnancy journey. Let me know what you think in the comments! ABOUT THOMAS VERNY Thomas R. Verny is a psychiatrist, writer and academic. He has previously taught at Harvard University, University of Toronto, York University, Toronto and St. Mary’s University Minneapolis, Minnesota. Dr. Verny’s books, professional publications and founding of the PPPANA, now APPPAH, and the Pre- and Perinatal Journal, have established him as one of the world’s leading authorities on the effect of the prenatal and early postnatal environment on personality development. He lectures and leads workshops on Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Psychotherapy through-out Canada, the United States, Europe, South America and Southeast Asia. THOMAS VERNY’S BOOKS * The Secret Life of the Unborn Child [https://smile.amazon.co.uk/Secret-Life-Unborn-Child-controversial/dp/0751510033/ref=smi_www_rco2_go_smi_g8682124849?_encoding=UTF8&%2AVersion%2A=1&%2Aentries%2A=0&ie=UTF8] * Pre-parenting * Cellular Consciousness

7 signs of a woman with tokophobia

WOMAN WITH TOKOPHOBIA [HTTPS://WWW.FEARFREECHILDBIRTH.COM/WP-CONTENT/UPLOADS/2019/01/TOKO-7-FB.JPG] [HTTPS://WWW.FEARFREECHILDBIRTH.COM/WP-CONTENT/UPLOADS/2019/01/TOKO-7-FB.JPG] HOW TO TELL IF YOU KNOW A WOMAN WITH TOKOPHOBIA Tokophobia is the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth. It’s not very well known and yet it can affect a lot of women. This extreme or pathological fear of birth is estimated to affect between 4 and 43% of women. 14% is an accepted estimate. So you see, a lot more common than you might think. Sadly, many women with tokophobia avoid pregnancy despite being desperate to be mothers. But that doesn’t mean you won’t come across it. [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/Pinterest_template-1.jpg]Some women only realise they have tokophobia once they’re pregnant. Up until that point, they might feel that “I’m just not maternal” or “I don’t like kids” which is something you hear a lot. However, both of these are typical comments made by women with tokophobia. It is simply their fear speaking. Of course, there are also many women who simply don’t want kids who say these things. But it’s possible that when a woman says she doesn’t want kids that her fear is clouding her judgement, or that her true feelings are buried beneath the fear. Once she has overcome her tokophobia, she may very well change her mind. I’ve seen this a lot with the women I’ve worked with. In fact, it was something that I used to say all the time. I recently met up with some people who I’d not seen for ten years and both of them told me how they would never have imagined that I would have had kids; they thought I didn’t want any! Well, that changed once I’d overcome my fears. WHY IT’S IMPORTANT TO KNOW IF A WOMAN HAS TOKOPHOBIA It can be easy to shrug this phobia off as silly or irrational, but doing that is missing the point. Many women with tokophobia don’t see this fear as irrational. You can actually die in childbirth: that’s something worth fearing. Compare that to claustrophobia; being trapped in an enclosed space is not known to be fatal. The fact is, a woman with tokophobia would love a bit of kindness and understanding about how she’s feeling. Having tokophobia can feel incredibly isolating because people don’t understand and are quick to judge. Here’s one woman’s experience of sharing how she felt; > I just explained that I suffer from tokophobiaand I was looking for some positive encouragement, maybe some stories from people who had been through it and could tell me some positive things. What I got instead was the nastiest group of mean girls I’ve encountered in a very long time. Seriously, these women jumped all over me. The pitchforks immediately came out. It was seriously upsetting! I hope that by sharing this, that you can better understand what they’re experiencing. If you have a wife or partner is tokophobic then maybe this post will help to explain things that you may have observed in your relationship. If you have friends who you suspect might have tokophobia then maybe this post will help you to better understand them. 7 SIGNS OF WOMEN WITH TOKOPHOBIA Not all women with tokophobia will experience all of these, but if a handful of them are present, then it’s a pretty good sign. 1. THEY AVOID CONVERSATIONS OF BABIES, PREGNANCY AND BIRTH [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/chatting-300x300.jpg] It’s often assumed that women love nothing better than to talk babies, but this simply isn’t true. Women with tokophobia will tend to remain silent if there is a group conversation that touches on babies, pregnancy or birth. They might do this because they simply have nothing to say and they can’t relate to what’s being said. But it could also be that they daren’t say anything because of the possible reaction from other women. Very often, women with tokophobia find that when they speak up about how they’re feeling, that other women do not understand or shrug off their feelings. They might feel judged or ashamed so they keep quiet. 2. THEY DON’T WANT TO HOLD A BABY Holding a baby could easily freak them out and bring out quite a reaction. This means that they’ve probably never held a baby. 3. THEY HAVE MEDICAL FEARS Women with tokophobia tend to have one or more fears that are related to medical things. So having a fear of needles and injections, fear of hospitals or doctors or a fear of medical procedures like vaginal examinations are very common. 4. THEY OBSESS OVER BIRTH CONTROL [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/preg-test.jpg]A woman with tokophobia will want to avoid pregnancy and birth at all costs so birth control could easily be an obsession for them. Pregnancy tests will be a huge source of terror for them because of what they might tell them. They might find themselves fantasising about things like artificial wombs because they simply don’t want to carry the baby. This means they might be interested in surrogacy or fostering as alternatives. 5. THEY’RE UNCOMFORTABLE GETTING INTIMATE OR HAVING SEX This is simply because sex leads to pregnancy, and pregnancy leads to birth, both of which has the potential to terrify them. So for a woman with tokophobia, the best way to avoid either is simply to avoid sex. This means that getting intimate might be problematic for them too because that might lead to sex. Many women with tokophobia find that they struggle to develop intimate relationships because of this. Or they sabotage relationships at a particular stage in the relationship. This is often the Let’s Get Serious stage where babies are discussed, but it might be sooner when sex starts to be more present in the relationship. 6. THEY RESENT GENDER INEQUALITY AND MEN NOT HAVING TO GIVE BIRTH It’s common for a woman with tokophobia to think that it’s not fair that women have to go through the life experience that is pregnancy and childbirth. Because they consider both pregnancy and childbirth to be so negative, they hate the fact that they are the ones in the relationship that will have to undergo the hardship and risks of pregnancy and birth. Some even resent men for this, although not all. 7. THEY HAVE A FEAR OF DEATH This might be a fear of them dying in childbirth or the baby. At a lesser level, this might be a fear of complications or things going wrong. They don’t consider this fear to be irrational as it’s often portrayed. For them, this is a rational fear; maternal mortality is something they take very seriously and they will probably be very clued up on the statistics. These are just a few of the tell-tale signs of women with tokophobia. If you think you know a woman with tokophobia, then be kind and understanding. And finally, I think it’s worth saying that tokophobia isn’t limited to women. MEN CAN HAVE IT TOO If a man has it and his partner is pregnant, then it could mean that he might really struggle with being in the birth room when the time comes for the arrival of the baby. DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE TOKOPHOBIA? If you think you have tokophobia and would like to overcome it, I’ve pulled together a free email series that helps you to think through your options. You can sign up for that right here [https://fearless-birthing.com/tokophobia-options/].

The Maternal Brain, with Jodi Pawluski

maternal brain [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/brain-FB.jpg] [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/brain-FB.jpg] Today’s podcast is all about the maternal brain and the neuroscience of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and parenting. A few months back I shared an article [https://www.bostonglobe.com/magazine/2018/07/17/pregnant-women-care-ignores-one-most-profound-changes-new-mom-faces/CF5wyP0b5EGCcZ8fzLUWbP/story.html?p1=HP_Special&fbclid=IwAR0JZgjBRKsHgZ4Dd0QBHkOJi7fBBPPi_oebelUsYgcDyNxoBmB5cr6Hj_U] about the maternal brain on my Facebook page and it went a bit nuts. It’s since been shared over 40 times which is unprecedented for my Facebook page. It also received tons of comments, many of which were saying how the article helped them to better understand what they were going through. So I knew I had to cover this topic on the podcast. I reached out to the expert that was quoted in the article, Jodi Pawluski, and was thrilled when she agreed to come on the podcast to talk about all things maternal brain. Jodi Pawluski is a perinatal mental health expert and Research Associate at the University of Rennes in France. Her research aims to promote maternal mental health: enhancing the health and well-being of both the mother and child. Her researchfocusis to determine the behavioral and neurobiological processes underlying maternal mental illness and use this information to improve mental health in women during the perinatal period. In other words, she knows a thing or two about the maternal brain! THE MATERNAL BRAIN During our conversation, Jodi talks about * the changes that are happening to our brain during pregnancy and how it’s an important evolution for becoming a new parent * how we have new brain circuitry coming online that provides us with the ability to tune into our infant by enabling us to experience a feeling of reward from our child and a feeling of attachment * changes to the mood and emotions during pregnancy * the role of the environment on the maternal brain aka “pregnancy brain” * how quickly a mother can tune into her infant > After half an hour of touching your baby’s hand, you will recognise your baby’s hand from touch alone. PREGNANCY BRAIN We talk about whether this is a “thing”. Some articles have stated that it’s not a thing, so we talk about what it could be instead and why it might feel that it really IS a thing. > 15% of women during pregnancy will have a high level of anxiety We touch on the important topic of anxiety and depression during pregnancy and taking medication when pregnant. And, we also cover the brain changes happening to dads…. there is so much in this conversation! FURTHER RESOURCES The Neurobiology of Postpartum Anxiety and Depression. [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28129895] The adaptive human parental brain: implications for children’s social development. [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/?term=25956962] The Neglected Neurobiology of Maternal Anxiety and Depression [https://www.neuropsychotherapist.com/the-neglected-neurobiology-of-maternal-anxiety-and-depression/] Jodi Pawluski [http://jodipawluski.weebly.com/]Why aren’t we talking about maternal brain changes? [https://www.mother.ly/news/report-motherhood-changes-our-brains-chelsea-conaboy]

Pregnancy Body Changes

pregnancy body changes [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/body-FB.jpg] [https://www.fearfreechildbirth.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/body-FB.jpg] Worrying about pregnancy body changes is something most pregnant women worry about. Whether it’s the expected changes in the shape of your body as pregnancy progresses, to the least expected changes that might happen as a result of birth complications – and everything in between! Pregnancy body changes are a huge source of worry for women which is why I wanted to talk about this on the podcast. To help do that I’m going to be joined by Bianca and Natasha from Bebo Mia [https://www.bebomia.com/]. They have a doula business and have been working with women for over 10 years so they’ve seen it all when it comes to women getting worried about pregnancy body changes.We cover quite a few angles when it comes to pregnancy body changes, from plus size pregnancies, to being pregnant when fit and of course vaginal tearing.. and lots more.LISTEN HERE PREGNANCY BODY CHANGES The adjustment you need to go through in how you perceive your body once you’re pregnant is quite significant. Many women have worries when it comes to pregnancy body changes which mean they struggle with this adjustment. This is particularly so for women who have strong feelings around their body – whether that’s love because they’ve spent a lot of effort being fit or whether they don’t like their body.Common worries and fears around pregnancy body changes include; * “why isn’t my pregnancy going like a “normal” pregnancy?” ….. whatever *that* is! * “I’m worried about gaining too much weight during my pregnancy” PLUS SIZE PREGNANCY We talk about BMI measurement and the obese categories. Yes, a BMI of 30 and above carries risks,  but it’s simply an increased risk, not an absolute or guaranteed outcome. As with all risks, it’s crucial to understand what the numbers are telling you. The important thing to bear in mind is that with plus size pregnancies, positive outcomes are all possible!Did you know that a common misguided belief is that overweight women are not strong enough to birth their babies? And another is that their vagina will be too fat. Yes, you read that right.A FAT VAGINA! Since when can you get a fat vagina?? How can a hole get fat? #crazytalkWe also talk about the importance of ditching the yo-yo dieting habitFIT WOMEN The Bebo Mia ladies are clear to state that it’s important for women to give themselves at least 6 weeks to recover. They encourage women to connect to their postpartum body rather than focus on trying to re-establish their pre-baby body.Another common problem is that some women are too scared to gain weight during pregnancy, with some women working out too much because they’re worried about gaining more than 25 pounds.CHANGES DOWN BELOW No chat about pregnancy body changes would be complete without talking about vaginal tearing. I know! Vaginal tearing is a HUGE fear among pregnant women. And yet interestingly, when I speak to women about their birth stories, vaginal tearing rarely features as something they worry about during birth – with many not even noticing it happening when it does. This vagina talk also covers; * the husband stitch * the importance of pelvic work This is a great episode that is made brilliant by my fabulous guests, who have also offered a discount on all products on their site – see below. ABOUT BEBO MIA bebo mia is a training & mentorship organization for women in the maternal health field, including pregnancy/birth professionals, childbirth educators & parenting specialists. They offer comprehensive skills, business support & community care through an innovative online structure that spans a global market.A very different culture from both the patriarchal boardroom model & the female-centric multi-level marketing industry, bebo mia offers opportunities for women to work from home while making an income for themselves and their families. They develop inclusive, accessible trainings for women that provide the skills needed to grow & sustain a lucrative business. bebo mia remains fiercely committed to their original mission that was developed in 2008: To connect women to their intrinsic value and power. Offer:Listeners can use the code: FEARFREE20 to receive 20% OFF all of our products.