You Might Try This

The Conflict Reflex: Why your default response to tension is working against you—and what to do instead.

Why do we still avoid difficult conversations, even when we know the cost? In this episode, Stacey Philpot and Cade Cowan explore the hidden reflexes driving conflict avoidance and escalation at work. Drawing on neuroscience and behavioral research, they explain how our brains interpret social conflict as physical pain, triggering automatic responses like silence or aggression. The discussion goes beyond awareness to offer practical ways to get “upstream” of these reactions by identifying what you’re protecting, whether it’s your relationships, self-image, or sense of control. Takeaways * Avoidance is often a reflex, not a choice * Conflict activates a biological threat response * Your default conflict style gets reinforced over time * Your reflexes are protecting something within you * How to get ahead of your reaction Chapters 00:00 Understanding Your Conflict Reflex 01:16 Why Knowing Isn’t Enough to Change Behavior 03:01 The Science Behind Conflict Avoidance and Reaction 06:37 Silence vs. Escalation: Two Common Conflict Patterns 11:12 Identifying Your Triggers and Contextual Responses 16:48 What Your Reflex Is Protecting 22:04 A Practical Method to Interrupt Your Reflex To learn more about us and the podcast, visit youmighttrythis.com and check us out on social media @youmighttrythis

The Courage Tax: What you pay every time you delay the conversation that needs to happen

Why do difficult conversations feel so much harder the longer we avoid them? In this episode, Stacey and Cade unpack the hidden “taxes” leaders pay when they delay hard conversations at work; from damaged relationships and declining performance to mental overload and unnecessary anxiety. They explore why silence often costs more than honesty. The conversation offers practical tools for leaders, including how to start difficult conversations, avoid climbing the ladder of inference, and use curiosity instead of judgment. Takeaways * Avoidance has real costs * Silence is often misinterpreted * The story in your head is usually worse than reality * Start with observable facts, not assumptions * Choose the right opening Chapters 00:00 The Cost of Avoiding Difficult Conversations 01:11 The Conversation You’ve Been Putting Off 03:05 The Hidden “Taxes” of Avoidance 06:50 Why Leaders Avoid Giving Feedback 08:22 The Cognitive Load of Unspoken Issues 10:26 Why Difficult Conversations Feel Worse Than They Are 17:52 How to Start a Difficult Conversation If you’re a leader struggling to bring up hard topics, this is the episode for you. To learn more about us and the podcast, visit youmighttrythis.com and check us out on social media @youmighttrythis

The Good Soldier Trap: Why being dependable can become a liability with LaToya Jordan

In this episode of You Might Try This, Stacey Philpot and Cade Cowan welcome Executive Coach and She Leads and Succeeds host LaToya Jordan for a powerful conversation about the “good soldier” trap: the career pattern where being dependable, helpful, and highly capable can quietly limit long-term growth. Together, they unpack how high-performing professionals, especially women, can become boxed in by their own excellence as executors, fixers, and problem-solvers. From “office housework” to low-visibility, high-effort tasks, the episode explores why saying yes too often can keep leaders stuck in support roles rather than strategic ones. Takeaways * Working harder can become the ceiling that limits career growth * High-effort, low-visibility work often stalls advancement * Saying yes to everything can reinforce the wrong professional brand * Strategic visibility matters more than constant execution * Ask questions before saying yes to new work Chapters 00:00:00 – The hidden cost of saying yes 00:01:15 – When hard work stops working 00:02:24 – The good soldier trap 00:06:24 – Office housework & invisible labor 00:09:00 – Every yes is a tradeoff 00:11:53 – How to say no (without damage) 00:17:48 – From note-taker to thought partner 00:21:09 – Auditing your work & shifting perception 00:23:56 – What leaders really look for 00:28:13 – Experiments to change your trajectory If you’ve ever wondered why hard work alone isn’t translating into advancement, this episode offers the language, frameworks, and courage to rethink what you say yes to. #executivecoaching [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23executivecoaching] #careeradvancement [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23careeradvancement] #growth [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23growth]

The Feedback Friction: Why “constructive criticism” usually constructs a wall

In this episode of You Might Try This, Stacey Philpot and Cade Cowan explore why leaders avoid giving feedback. They break down the psychology behind feedback fear, including how negative feedback triggers a real pain response in the brain and threatens identity. Challenging outdated methods like the feedback sandwich (also known as a sh*t sandwich), they introduce practical tools like the SBI (situation-behavior-impact) framework, an “adjective ban,” and feedforward strategies. The result: clearer, more constructive conversations that build trust, improve performance, and turn feedback into a powerful tool for leadership growth. Takeaways * Clear, direct feedback builds trust and supports growth * Focusing on observable behavior instead of character judgments betters the feedback session * Avoid the feedback sandwich and lead with clarity * Use the SBI framework: situation, behavior, impact * Shift the conversation toward future improvement Chapters 1:01 – Why leaders avoid feedback 7:23 – Selfishness and moral contagion 10:57 – Neuroscience of negative feedback 17:44 – Fundamental attribution error 20:06 – Adjective ban and SBI model 25:03 – Three experiments to try If you’re an emerging leader, newly promoted manager, or ambitious professional aiming for your next level, this episode will help you rethink how you create value and what to let go of to grow. #leadership [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23leadership] #management [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23management] #feedback [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23feedback]

The Expert Trap: How being the smartest person in the room can become your biggest liability

In this episode of You Might Try This, hosts Stacey Philpot and Cade Cowan explore a critical leadership shift many high performers never see coming: when the skills that earned you a promotion start holding you back. They unpack the “expert trap”: how relying too heavily on your own expertise can turn you into a bottleneck, undermine your team’s confidence, and quietly derail your leadership trajectory. Through real-world examples and research-backed insights, Stacey and Cade explain why rewriting your team’s work, stepping in too fast, or role-modeling instead of coaching can erode trust, limit growth, and prevent future promotions. This conversation dives into the identity shift required when moving from individual contributor to leader, the hidden costs of control, and why organizations promote leaders who build successors, not bottlenecks. You’ll also hear practical strategies for delegating without disengaging, coaching without rescuing, and creating real ownership across your team. In this episode, you’ll learn: 1. Why being an expert can quietly damage your leadership effectiveness 2. How rewriting work and “saving” your team reduces capability and trust 3. The difference between role modeling and coaching and why it matters 4. How fear, control, and identity protectiveness show up in new leaders 5. Practical ways to delegate, build successors, and scale your impact Chapters 00:00 When your strengths start holding you back 01:15 The promotion shift no one explains 02:53 How experts become bottlenecks 09:16 The gap leaders don’t see (and why it matters) 12:05 Why you won’t get promoted without a successor 17:22 How to stop overworking and start leading If you’re an emerging leader, newly promoted manager, or ambitious professional aiming for your next level, this episode will help you rethink how you create value and what to let go of to grow. #leadership [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23leadership] #management [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23management] #careergrowth [https://www.dropbox.com/?q=%23careergrowth]