Uniquely Wired Child

What Looks Like Defiance Is Often Exhaustion: Autistic Girls, Masking, and Meltdowns with Jess Hendrickx

Why do so many autistic girls appear “fine” at school only to completely fall apart at home? In this episode of Educating the Uniquely Wired Child, Dr. Kristan Shimpi talks with Jess Hendrickx, co-author of Women and Girls on the Autism Spectrum, about masking, emotional exhaustion, meltdowns, boundaries, self-acceptance, and the hidden pressures many autistic girls carry every single day. Together, they explore:  • why autistic girls are so often missed or misunderstood  • the emotional cost of masking all day  • why meltdowns are often a pressure release rather than “bad behavior”  • spoon theory, ticket theory, and energy accounting  • the importance of helping girls build healthy boundaries  • and why recognizing limits is not the same as “giving in” This conversation offers an affirming and compassionate perspective for parents, educators, therapists, and anyone supporting neurodivergent girls behind the scenes. Because sometimes what looks like defiance is actually exhaustion. 🎧 Connect with Uniquely Wired Child and find additional resources here: https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child [https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child]

Parenting in the Daily Grind: Where You Can Ease Up Without Giving In

In this episode of Educating the Uniquely Wired Child, I sit down with educator, founder, and parent Linda McDonough for a grounded conversation about what it actually looks like to support uniquely wired children in real life… not just in theory. We talk about the daily grind many families find themselves in, and how small shifts in where we put our energy can make a meaningful difference over time. One moment that stayed with me from this conversation: “Store-bought cake is fine. If your child insists on sleeping in tomorrow’s clothes, let them. There are places you can cut corners without giving in.” This episode is about letting go of the idea that everything has to be done “right” and instead focusing on what actually moves your child and your family forward. 🔗 Resources & Links 🎧 Join the Parent Community:  https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child [https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child] (You can connect with other parents, access resources, and continue conversations like this one.) 💡 NC Innovations Waiver (Medicaid-funded support program):  https://medicaid.ncdhhs.gov/nc-innovations-waiver [https://medicaid.ncdhhs.gov/nc-innovations-waiver] The NC Innovations Waiver is a Medicaid-funded program in North Carolina that can provide support and services for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities, helping families access resources in home and community settings.

The ADHD Story You Don’t Hear: Growing Up, Masking, and Making It Work

On paper, she looked successful. But behind the scenes, it took far more effort than anyone realized. In this episode, I’m joined by a college senior in a nursing program who was diagnosed with ADHD at just six years old. Together, we talk about what ADHD actually looks like over time, not just in early childhood, but through middle school, high school, and into college. She shares what it felt like to grow up with a diagnosis that didn’t quite match her identity… and what she wishes adults had understood along the way. This is an honest, reflective conversation about effort, expectations, and the gap between what others see and what’s really happening underneath. If you’ve ever wondered what ADHD can look like beyond the stereotypes (especially in girls) this episode offers a perspective we don’t hear often enough. 🔑 What We Talk About * Being diagnosed with ADHD at a young age  * Why ADHD didn’t match how she saw herself  * The hidden effort behind “doing well” in school  * How expectations shift from childhood to college  * What adults often miss when supporting kids with ADHD  * What she wishes teachers and parents had understood  💬 A Note for Parents If your child seems to be “doing fine” on the surface but struggles behind the scenes, you’re not alone. So many kids (especially girls) learn to compensate in ways that mask what they actually need. 🎧 Listen & Follow Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. 🔗 Connect & Resources * 🌿 Parent Community: https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child * 📘 Workbook: Educating the Uniquely Wired Child [https://payhip.com/b/EfVmr]  * 📱 Instagram/TikTok: @uniquely.wired.child  ⭐ If This Episode Resonated Share it with a parent who needs to hear this perspective and consider leaving a review to help more families find this work.

She Looks Fine at School... What Teachers Really See

She’s Fine at School… But Is She? What Teachers Really See What do experienced teachers actually notice about uniquely wired students… and what often gets missed? In this episode, I sit down with veteran elementary teacher Heather Bearman, who shares what 30 years in the classroom has taught her about students who learn and think differently. We talk about masking (especially in girls), the quiet signs of struggle that can go unnoticed, and what truly helps a child feel safe and understood at school. If you’ve ever been told “everything looks fine at school” but know your child is struggling, this conversation will give you a new lens. This episode is for parents, educators, and anyone supporting a uniquely wired child. https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child [https://linktr.ee/uniquely.wired.child]

When Girls Mask: A Conversation with a Former Student

In this episode of Educating the Uniquely Wired Child, I sit down with a former student, Kristine, who is now an adult reflecting on her experience growing up with a uniquely wired brain. Kristine shares what school felt like from the inside, the effort it took to keep up, the ways she learned to mask her struggles, and why some teachers were able to help her while others missed the signs completely. One insight that stood out during our conversation was this: the teachers who seemed to understand her best were often teachers who were uniquely wired themselves. This episode explores what masking can look like for girls with ADHD and learning differences, why their challenges are often overlooked, and what parents and educators can learn from listening to the lived experiences of students themselves. If you are raising a daughter who appears to be doing “fine” at school but is exhausted or overwhelmed at home, this conversation may feel very familiar. In This Episode We Discuss: • What masking can look like for girls with ADHD or learning differences  • Why many girls go unidentified for years  • The hidden effort it takes to keep up in school  • Why some teachers recognize these struggles and others miss them  • What parents can learn from listening to the lived experiences of their children Resources Mentioned Educating the Uniquely Wired Child: The Workbook  Available here:  https://payhip.com/b/EfVmr [https://payhip.com/b/EfVmr] Connect with Dr. Kristan Shimpi Podcast: Educating the Uniquely Wired Child Instagram / TikTok: @uniquely.wired.child