This Is Unusable

Transcendental

Welcome to another episode of whatever this is. We have officially transcended. Or something. It's in the title and it doesn't matter. This is a doozy of an episode, and by "doozy" I mean "episode". So it's an episode of an episode. Words are a helluva thing, aren't they? Sometimes they mean so much. Other times they mean absolutely nothing at all. We generally prefer the latter. In this episode we discuss: - Trazodone - Tyler's hat, what it is, and and then a further explanation of what it is because the initial explanation is utterly insufficient. - The Jamaican accent - Repetitive music like ska, reggae, and reggaeton. -Capocollo (which Ben mispronounces as "capicola") vs gabagool. - The word "finna". - The fact that the midwest accent is not really an accent but is rather just bad English because it doesn't differentiate itself enough from the general American accent to actually be considered something new. - Joe Biden and old senators - Ben's experience with an edible - The video game Panzer Dragoon

Insomnia

Ben has had insomnia for the better part of 4 months and is quickly losing his mind. Other things we discuss: the Wilhelm scream, the Bechtel test, insomnia, allergies, insomnia, more insomnia, Ben's insane noisy neighbor, Reese’s Pieces, reddit streaks, underwear streaks, simple solutions to simple problems, woody woodpecker, Netflix, and The Odyssey by Christopher Nolan. #comedy #podcast #insomnia

Forgot The News Already

Ben already totally forgot about what went down at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner. Tyler had to remind him. That's where we are with the news these days. Topics discussed: - Ben's fake vocal warmup routine - Diarrhea, constipation, and constipated diarrhea. - "Ballroom Blitz" - CT Scans - Fat people - Genetically modified organisms - Eugenics - The White House Correspondents' Dinner attempt - Black Flag and Ben's encounter with Henry Rollins - Al Gore, 9/11 and political inflection points - James Comey - Sloppy Joe Biden - Ben clipping people's hair - Pizza Gate 22:32 Tyler's Poem

Cat Pope

Unbeknownst to most, the Pope is actually made up for a bunch of cats stacked on top of each other. We discuss Latin, things Ben enjoys, the Catholic Church, Jesus, how to say "cat" in Greek, the Portland Trailblazers, Fox News, the burning down of the White House in 1812, the band Oasis, yarmulkes, the story of Job, Sodom and Gomorrah, the movies "Amour" and "Funny Games" by Michael Haneke, the Adam Sandler movie "Click", and pizza week in Portland.

Tis The Sneezin

'Twas the month before May, And all through each day, Ben's nose was running: A fever of hay. Ben has some major allergy problem in this episode. Also there are some dick jokes. We talk about Seattle's cream cheese problem, Ben's neighbors, the Straight of Hormuz, a Tommy Wiseau film Tyler saw, Bosley hair restoration, unending allergies, more allergies, lots of allergies, and Tyler's newfound urinary issues.