Foster the Wallens with Sly and Kelly

What If Loving Them Means Losing Them

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2499154/fan_mail/new] The moment you realize a child you love is going home feels like someone suddenly knocked the wind out of you. One minute you’re packing lunches, folding tiny clothes, and building routines… and the next, you’re trying to figure out how to say goodbye to someone who became part of your family. This week on our foster care series, we’re talking about the hardest part of fostering: loving a child with your whole heart while knowing you may eventually have to let them go. We revisit our first placement story with Kamilla, including the emotional “plot twist” where we truly believed adoption was becoming the plan — until a conversation with the social worker changed everything. We talk honestly about how confusing the child welfare system can feel, the mixed messages foster parents sometimes receive, and how quickly reunification timelines can shift when you least expect it. For families who crave structure and certainty, that unpredictability can be devastating. But goodbye doesn’t just affect foster parents. We open up about the ripple effect attachment has on everyone in the home — siblings, grandparents, friends, and the people who loved these kids alongside us. We share what rapid transition visits looked like, the anxiety of not really knowing the biological family, and how fear and heartbreak can quietly turn foster parents and biological parents into “enemies” in each other’s minds, even when everyone ultimately wants what’s best for the child. We also share the things that helped us survive the grief: sending kids home with comfort items and photos, making sure they left knowing they were deeply loved, and the small coping mechanisms — like grief cleaning and staying busy — that helped us make it through the silence after they left. If you’ve ever thought, “I could never do foster care because I’d get too attached,” we understand that completely. And honestly? Attachment is the point. Loving them fully is the point. We hope this episode helps you better understand both the beauty and heartbreak of foster care. Subscribe, share this episode with someone curious about fostering, and leave a review so more families can find the show. And tell us — what question should we answer next?

When The Call Finally Comes

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2499154/fan_mail/new] What happens when the county number flashes across your phone… and you have only seconds to decide if your life is about to change forever? In this episode, we take you back to those early foster care days — the waiting, the anxiety, the fear, and the split-second “yes” that changed everything. We share the reality behind placement calls, what counties tell you (and what they don’t), and the pressure of trying to make huge decisions with almost no time to think. We open up about our very first placements, including the unforgettable Friday afternoon call for an 11-month-old experiencing neglect. From scrambling for childcare and supplies to walking into the agency with almost no idea what to expect, we relive the chaos, exhaustion, heartbreak, and beauty of that first night. We talk about: • the emotional rollercoaster after licensing and the home study • the pressure of making a fast yes-or-no decision • how couples navigate placement calls together • the realities working foster parents face trying to coordinate childcare • why our first placement experience was far from typical • bringing home a baby with little more than hope and adrenaline • guessing sizes, routines, food, and everything in between • the incredible village that showed up with diapers, pajamas, and dinner • the strange mix of joy and grief that foster care brings into your home This episode is messy, emotional, honest, and deeply personal — because foster care changes your home, but it also changes you. And if you’ve ever gotten “the call,” we would LOVE to hear your story too. 💛 If there’s something you want us to talk about, explain further, or questions you still have about foster care or adoption, let us know. Your questions could inspire a future episode.

How To Get Licensed As Foster Parents Without Losing Your Mind

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2499154/fan_mail/new] The foster care license is the part nobody glamorizes and it can test your schedule, your patience, and your confidence before a child ever walks through your door. We share what licensing looked like for us as a married couple and parents, from the first online inquiry to the moment the agency lays out the reality: training hours, home study visits, safety requirements, and a mountain of paperwork. We talk through the biggest decisions and the most common worries we hear from future foster parents. Should you choose a public county agency or a private agency? What changes when kids come from your local area versus hours away across the state? We also get honest about the doubts that show up fast: finances, childcare, home size, inspections, medical costs, and whether you have any say in the placements that come to your home. Along the way, we share what actually helped us get through it: staying organized with a simple binder system, bringing our daughter into age-appropriate conversations, and building a real support network. Foster parent training taught us about trauma, attachment, and reunification, but our village taught us how to survive the day-to-day, especially when the phone rings and life flips in minutes. If you’re researching how to become a foster parent, foster care licensing, foster parent training, or what a home study involves, this is the candid behind-the-scenes version. If this helped, subscribe so you don’t miss next week’s story about the first placement call, and please share the show with someone who’s been thinking about fostering. What part of the licensing process would make you hesitate the most?

Meet the Wallens… Hard Stories, Soft Hearts, and a Whole Lot of Chaos

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2499154/fan_mail/new] You don’t end up with seven kids by accident. We’re Kelly and Sly—and somewhere along the way, our home became the place where sibling groups land… and where love has to stretch further than the budget. Hard stories. Soft hearts. Fierce love. This is Foster the Wallens. Where foster care meets real life—and no one tells it perfectly. After more than a decade as foster parents and welcoming over 18 kids through our doors, we created Foster the Wallens to tell this story the way it actually happened—raw, real, and right from the middle of it. From the couch, the car rides, and everywhere this life has taken us. We start at the beginning—who we are, how our kids came to us through foster care and adoption, and why this season looks different now that we’ve chosen not to renew our foster license. We’re stepping into something new: raising our forever kids… while also realizing we’re somehow parents of an adult with graduation around the corner. Then we rewind—back to what led us here. The fears we didn’t say out loud. The myths people believe about fostering. The moments that changed everything—like meeting our first placement, realizing how much something as simple as a birthday party can matter, and watching our daughter grow into a more selfless, compassionate human because of the kids who came through our home. If you care about foster care, adoption, sibling groups, reunification, trauma-informed parenting—or you just want a real, honest look at what this life actually feels like—come ride the roller coaster with us. Hard stories. Soft hearts. Fierce love. This is Foster the Wallens… reminding you that even in the hardest moments, love still shows up. Subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find the show. 💛