Ep. 17 - The Era Of Me - A Midlife Mantra
Rachel cracks open the belief that keeps showing up disguised as concern, judgment, or a raised eyebrow: that a midlife woman saying "it's my turn" is somehow too much. It started with a TikTok clip of Michelle Obama answering one question with one word, me, and the eye roll that followed from another woman watching. Rachel unpacks why that reaction lands so hard, why women dismiss each other's wanting the same way they dismiss their own, and what actually happens when a woman finally stops waiting for everyone else's permission to choose herself.
In this episode:
* The TikTok clip that started it all: Barack Obama says "fun," Michelle says "me," and one word gets celebrated while the other gets an eye roll
* Why a woman's reaction to another woman wanting something reveals what she believes about her own right to want
* My own confession: the time I judged my brother-in-law for moving to Colorado for himself, and what I had to admit about why
* The double standard nobody says out loud: men get to put themselves first, women get told it's selfish
* Where the "selfless woman" script actually comes from, and the story about my mom and the bread basket that says it all
* Why breaking this cycle matters for your kids, whether they're watching a mom who puts herself last or one who doesn't
* The reframe that changes everything: wanting more for yourself does not mean you love your life or your family less
* What I've actually watched happen when women give themselves permission to want more, and it is not what you'd think
* The line I need you to hear twice: choosing yourself doesn't take anything away from the people you love, it gives them more of you
* The question I'd ask the woman who rolled her eyes: what answer would have felt okay to you
* Why it's your turn right now, whether you're 45, 47, or 51, and why you don't have to earn it first
Mentioned in this episode:
* Rachel's email list (with a freebie inside): rachelaperry.com
* Not Done Yet Sessions: a 90-minute conversation to figure out what you actually want, what's been stopping you, and your next step https://www.rachelaperry.com/ndysession
Connect with Rachel:
* Website: rachelaperry.com
* Instagram: @rachelaperry
* TikTok: @rachelaperry
If this one hit a nerve, send it to a woman in your life who's been talking herself out of saying "me." She's not done yet either.
Ready to stop circling the thing you can't stop thinking about? Take the free Not Done Yet Spark and discover your next step.
www.rachelaperry.com/spark