Procedural Veneration

Haven: Bad boy Duke makes fools of us all

Loosely tangentially related to a thought Stephen King once had... This week we talk about SyFy original Haven, known for putting WWE superstar Edge on the map. I cannot express enough, this show is not Eureka. Join us as we discuss poop-colored aether, cocoon sleep-crime, and cozy seaside Maine towns that are actually Nova Scotian. We looked at the first, second and last episodes to make our opinions on the Nathan vs. Duke conflict clear. Stay out of our way fanfic authors. Content warnings: abusive parents, a lot of orphans, alien nonsense. Theme song by Jake Krutulis.

Numb3rs: Horizontal Sex Magnate

You've been enum3rated! This week we talk about CBS Drama Numb3rs, and no, it never gets any easier to type. Join us as we discuss the troubling monopoly David Krumholtz holds on bedroom activities, and a deep-dive into the psyche of double-- make that triple-- agents.We discuss the best (S3E24 The Janus List), worst (S2E3 Obsession), and most mediocre (S5E15 Guilt Trip) episodes and make harsh judgment on the buffoons and geniuses of numbers.Content warnings for Stalking, murder, acts of terrorism, reference to sexual violence, and beach mansions.Theme song credit to Jake Krutulis.

CSI NY: Ben Stiller's Mummified Corpse

The triumphant return of ProcVen! This week we dive into another Gary Sinise romp, this time in the CSI Universe. Join us as we watch the best (S6E10 Death House), worst (S1E5 A Man a Mile), and median-rated (S7E8 Scared Stiff). Will Gary's charming delivery save this snooze fest, or will New York's dark past consume itself.Content Warnings: Murder, Accidental Fratricide, Drowning, Escape RoomsWe also recognize that crime procedurals exist as a form of "Copaganda" by portraying civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light.Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

Castle: The Reverse Flash's Spy Bullshit

The season finale of Procedural Veneration! = HUGE SPOILERS FOR THE TV SHOW CASTLE IN THIS EPISODE =We tire quickly at spy bullshit forced into a perfectly decent crime show. Hank puts together a scene. The Reverse Flash rears his yellow cowled face.Watch the best (S4 E22 Always), worst (S8 E22 LokSat), and median (S7 E2 Montreal) rated episodes along with us and find out.Content Warnings: * Homicide * Undercover boss * Joss Whedon We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light.Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

Criminal Minds Beyond Borders: Can We Take That Again Gary?

It is official. Our friendship with Gary has ended. We watch Criminal Minds Beyond Borders and answer the questions: 1) Can Gary try that line again? 2) Is it possible for such a star studded cast to have such low chemistry with each other? and 3) Is this show part of a deep-seeded and widespread conspiracy? Watch the best (S2 E7 La Huesuda), worst (S1 E12 Harvested), and kind of median (S1 E2 Harvested) episodes along with us and find out. Content Warnings: Racism, Xenophobia, Mutilation, Torture. We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying policing, civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light. Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!