Midlife, Hormones & Speaking Up: Tracey Willingham on Self-Trust, Advocacy & Being Unladylike
Episode 7 Show Notes — Tracey Willingham (That Hormone Girl)
Episode Title:
When Your Body Changes the Rules: Hormones, Self-Trust, and Speaking Up in Midlife
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About This Episode
Have you ever walked out of a doctor's appointment feeling more dismissed than when you walked in? Or spent months second-guessing yourself, wondering if you were making it all up — only to realize that the second-guessing itself is a symptom?
In Episode 7, host Jenn Fast welcomes Tracey Willingham — hormone health advocate, licensed social worker, and host of the That's Not Very Ladylike podcast — for a conversation that is equal parts permission slip and practical toolkit.
Tracey left her VP role at a nonprofit after years of unaddressed perimenopause symptoms and a healthcare system that kept telling her everything was normal. She built her work, her brand, and her "Speak Up Membership" from that lived experience — and she is boldly, unapologetically not here to make anyone comfortable.
This is not just a hormone conversation. It's a conversation about identity, burnout, self-trust, and what it means to stop shrinking yourself to stay comfortable for everyone else.
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What You'll Hear
- Why women who are already on HRT still seek Tracey out — and what that reveals about what's missing
- How hormonal shifts affect far more than physical symptoms: identity, relationships, work, and self-trust
- Why the self-doubt and second-guessing you feel right now is a symptom, not a character flaw
- Practical tools for speaking up in medical appointments — including the power of silence, bringing an advocate, and how to use the patient portal to create a paper trail
- Why HR works for the company (and what to do instead)
- What "unladylike on purpose" actually means — and what it costs women to stay ladylike
- Tracey's "Speak Up Membership" — combining AI-based coaching tools, human support, and community for healthcare, workplace, and personal conversations
- The concept of "second puberty" — and why midlife is actually your most powerful reinvention window
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Key Takeaway
"Whatever you're experiencing right now — it is real. It doesn't have to make sense to exist."
— Tracey Willingham
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Timestamps
- 00:00 — The moment the old rules stopped working
- 00:49 — Meet Tracey Willingham (That Hormone Girl)
- 02:16 — Why she quit her nonprofit VP job
- 04:08 — What "unladylike on purpose" really means
- 07:07 — Hormones beyond physical symptoms
- 09:31 — Self-blame, shame, and why women carry everyone else's feelings
- 11:38 — Second-guessing as a symptom
- 13:21 — What "speaking up" actually looks like (with yourself, your doctor, your partner, at work)
- 17:22 — How to prepare for a doctor's appointment so you don't leave feeling dismissed
- 21:05 — Advocacy scripts that work: silence, pausing, pushing back on "normal"
- 25:01 — The Speak Up Membership: what it is, who it's for, and how the AI coaching works
- 31:44 — Midlife as a "second puberty" — and what that means for you
- 34:10 — Final thoughts and how to connect
If today's episode resonated with you, please subscribe, share it with a woman who needs to hear it, and leave a five-star review. It helps other women find this show.
Connect with Tracey:
* Speak Up Membership [https://go.thathormonegirl.com/speak-up-membership]
* Instagram: @thathormonegirl [https://www.instagram.com/thathormonegirl]
* That’s Not Very Ladylike Podcast [https://go.thathormonegirl.com/tnvll-podcast]
* Tracey’s Everything Page [https://go.thathormonegirl.com/thg-everything-page]
Want support with your own midlife hormone foundation?
I put together the Menopause Foundations Program [https://reinventionwithjennfast.com/menopause-foundations-purchase-page-597784] for exactly this moment — when you know something has shifted and you’re ready to understand it, address it, and build from it.
👉 Learn more here [https://reinventionwithjennfast.com/menopause-foundations-purchase-page-597784]
Connect with Jenn Fast
Website: reinventionwithjennfast.com
If you have any questions or are interested in being on this show, please reach to me at info@reinventionwithjennfast.com
Instagram: @reinventionwithjennfast
As always — I’m glad you’re here.
Jenn Fast
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit comebackletter.substack.com [https://comebackletter.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]