The Dad Hat

Getting It All Out At The End With Jeff Stewart: Dad Hat 018

In today's episode of The Dad Hat, I talk to Jeff Stewart, author of "Living: Inspiration From A Father With Cancer." Let's Meet Today's Guest On The Dad Hat, Jeff Stewart Jeff Stewart is a healthcare consultant, scientist, inventor, award-winning playwright, and father of seven. He was a Jeopardy! College Champion and runner-up in the Tournament of Champions. Jeff lives in Cary, North Carolina. Parsing The Science And Good Luck They began by discussing how Jeff's training as a biologist affect things. He was able to better parse through the information received from well meaning friends to avoid wasting time on unproven treatments or other types of pseudoscience. The book includes many inspirations, Lee thought of them as life lessons. One of them being to recognize good luck as well as the bad. Jeff mentions his own good luck in having the cancer diagnosed at all since it would have been missed in standard testing. Living For Now, Teaching For Tomorrow From here the question moves onto a discussion about how the diagnosis affected Jeff's outlook. Most people think in terms of five maybe ten years. Jeff had to learn to live for the immediate future and for the long term. Next they talk about the most important lessons Jeff and his wife taught to their children. Jeff's kids are very kind and they learned to be that way because Jeff learned when to let go of dominance as a parent and allow his children to learn to make the right decisions. What's Kindness And Competing With Our Kids Jeff goes on to explain what kindness means to him and the contrast between being kind and 'being nice'. After discussing some of Jeff's inventive work the conversation turns to Jeff's formative years in rural Oregon. He learned a lot from his parents who were both teachers and firmly connected to their community. One piece of advice Jeff would give to all the fathers out there is that they aren't in competition with their kids. Lee brings up the book The Conscious Parent and it's idea that parent tend to try making their kids into better versions of themselves. The guys discuss whether this is a good strategy. The Age For Sex Ed And Birthrates When asked if anything changed in his parenting approach since his eldest child was born Jeff responds that with the idea that we're bound to change quite a bit in that amount of time (31 years). Jeff shares a couple things he would change about his parenting back then and a few things he felt he did right. A curve-ball question leads to talking about sex ed. When is the best time to talk to your kids and how should you do it? Jeff gives us his advice based on the studies he's read on the subject. Basically saying it should be an ongoing conversation that leaves little room for curiosity. They're going to learn it, you want them to learn it from you. And since they're in the neighborhood subject-wise Lee brings up birthrates. Jeff looks at the subject from an economic standpoint and thinks it unlikely that we're going to produce enough births to avoid some level of population decline. Perspective And My Favorite Bits Wrapping up the conversation they get back to the book, revealing two of Jeff's favorite bits of inspiration in the book. They are, funnily enough, about books and what you can or can't learn form them. Jeff shares bit about his children's reaction to the book and some of the conversation it brought about. Finally Lee asks for a bit more about what keeps Jeff going. Jeff credits his religious belief and his experiences of doing hard things. Everything seems easier if you have the right perspective. Hopefully, todays episode with author, Jeff Stewart gives you some added perspective on your life and how your living it. Jeff Stewart Resources & Extra Media - https://www.amazon.com/Living-Inspiration-Father-Jeff-Stewart/dp/B0C3KSDYZ6

Examining The Fatherly Wisdom On Twitter With Nicky P: Dad Hat 017

In today's episode of The Dad Hat, I talk to our producer Nicky P about an advice thread floating around on Twitter. Let's Meet Today's Guest On The Dad Hat, Nicky P Nicky P is a freelance marketer, podcaster, and copywriter out of Cleveland, Ohio, where he runs Iron Age Marketing. He is also our esteemed producer here on The Dad Hat. On top of his marketing work, he is also the resident pop culture expert on The Road To Hell Film Reviews podcast, where he discusses science fiction and the history of utopianism. He's been a professional musician for 24 years, a husband for ten, and a father for nine. Competition (Even With Our Dads) Makes Us Better Nicky P opens up the show utilizing what little sports information he has to discuss leadership. This leads into how competition made him a better cross-country runner in the rare instances he was challenged in high school. In what ways does competition with our fathers shape the way we develop? Both Lee and Nicky P delve into the ways subtle competition with their dads may have created who they are today. Relationships With Our Moms Are Important But Complicated Both Lee and Nicky P cover the following rules as posted by Save Our Sons on Twitter: 1. No one will love you as much as your mother. The People Around Us And Before Us Should Make Us Better Both Lee and Nicky P cover the following rules as posted by Save Our Sons on Twitter: 2. There's no such thing as ‘fair’. 3. The right woman will propel you to greatness. 4. Pornography is evil. 5. Your ancestors knew more than you think. Stoicism And Your Value On The Relationship Market Both Lee and Nicky P cover the following rules as posted by Save Our Sons on Twitter: 6. You must control your emotions. 7. Pain is a prerequisite for growth.

The Difference Between Family & Business With Lance Cayco: Dad Hat 015

Let's Meet Today's Guest On The Dad Hat Lance Cayco Lance Cayco is a partner behind F9 Productions, an architectural firm out of Colorado as well as the host of the Behind The Firm podcast. He is a unique design professional with over 20 years of hands-on construction experience. He has worked in the field as a carpenter and independent contractor spanning throughout North Dakota, Montana, and Idaho. Lee opens up the clip with: Is the tiny house market booming? Lance discusses his belief that the origins of the tiny house movement started in the Occupy Wall Street movement and has been surprised by how long it's held on despite insane costs for tiny homes. He further adds that he's unsure whether the bears are correct, and we're headed for another housing crisis. Lee retorts with questions about subprime loans. Lance looks to the drastic changes in lending policy to make things less volatile now. Sure, the financial products are constantly chopped and screwed and resold as something else, but at least the banks aren't talking to home appraisers directly. Lee: What is fatherhood to you? What are the pillars? Lance establishes his one-word answer as Sacrifice. He goes on to recollect a story of a three-year period when his first wife left for three years, and he was forced to raise their three children as a single parent as he launched his business. During this period, he still managed to keep his kids in private school while working paycheck to paycheck. He speculates this has something to do with his adoptive father. Kids are your legacy, your seed, your hope for the future. This spins off into a brief aside about stoicism. Lee: What word best describes fatherhood: supporter, creator, provider? Lance chooses "provider." He then begins a story about his father doing what is necessary to keep the family farm running out of familial loyalty to his father. This modest beginning is what pushed Lance to make sure his own children never internalized the stress of being poor like he remembered. Lance quotes Ye: "Having money isn't everything, but not having it is." It's not about possessions but knowing Dad will be able to give you what you need if you ask. What kind of anxieties can he alleviate for them? Lee asks for Lance's opinion on gender norms and the nuclear family. Lance admits to being very traditional in his views of family structure and nods to the average natures of men and women being better suited for certain tasks in child-rearing. Lee then turns the question toward business. Lance begins a very self-deprecating story about how little difference he sees between his role as a father and that of a business owner. He makes sure to say not in a patronizing way but in a nurturing way. He wants employees that are able to learn without baggage. He follows this up with two stories, one familial and one business related. Lee: Did those three years make you better as a person? Lance is a catholic and a firm believer in god and lives his life by providence. He reasons with Lee that adversity is the story that people need to hear. Lee asks Lance if his desire to make his children secure in all things is at odds with his understanding that they need to learn to be resilient. Lance then uses summer jobs and loans as a way to properly educate them about when usury and how loans shouldn't be taken lightly or unnecessarily. Lee: Are we in a period of weak men? Lance dives into the science behind testosterone dwindling in humanity. While elaborating, he starts pointing fingers at the tech sector foremost. They are the "weak men" afraid to not censor everyone else. Lee retorts with Jeff Bezos as the exception that breaks makes the rule before launching into the things that have made him weak in life before attributing competition to being his saving grace. Lance Cayco Resources & Extra Media - https://f9productions.com/

Presence Is A Parents Superpower With Shaun (S.F.) Banks: Dad Hat 013

In today's episode of The Dad Hat, I talk to Shaun "S.F." Banks, Father, self-defense instructor, and youth development leader. Let's Meet Today's Guest On The Dad Hat, Shaun "S.F." Banks Shaun (S.F.) Banks runs YCHIA Youth Conferences for youths ages 5-17 to inspire and equip them to follow their dreams, and Camp Warrior King which gives them a summer camp on steroids. In addition, he teaches self-defense to women and children with I Am Defense. In addition, Banks is the mind behind Team Hott Sawce, a kids' cartoon series that follows the Galaxy Guardians and Veggie Defenders around the galaxy fighting “The Negatives,” a clan of interstellar insects terrorizing the Veggie Galaxy. Shaun "S.F." Banks And The Importance Of Time Over Money In my conversation with Shaun "S.F." Banks, we dive into his upbringing raised by a single mother. We discuss his turn from "not liking kids" to becoming a youth leader and self-defense instructor to women and children. Our conversation is a beautiful look at what a positive attitude and time spent with parents and mentors does to raise resilient adults. Hopefully, today's episode gives you a better understanding of how important spending our time with our children truly is. Shaun "S.F." Banks Resources & Extra Media - https://www.gosfb.com/ - https://www.linkedin.com/in/sfbanks/

Financial Planning Between The Lies With Luke Tatum: Dad Hat 012

Luke Tatum is is the founder of Perfect Spiral Capital and the Author of Between The Lies: How To Reclaim Your Future From The Banks And Wall Street. Luke is a practitioner of the Infinite Banking Concept (IBC) and helps his clients utilize the technique to find greater freedom in their lives. Luke has utilized the technique to start his business and homestead in Arkansas. Luke Tatum And Living Life Between The Lies During our discussion today, Luke introduces us to the Infinite Banking concept and how he uses it in his practice. During the course of this, he let's us in on some of the broader issues our banking system has created. In addition to IBC, Luke lets us in on life as a homesteader and pulling his autistic son out of the school system to homeschool. Hopefully, you will walk away from today's episode with some new ideas on how you can take better care of your family in the future. Luke Tatum Resources & Extra Media - perfectspiralcapital.com - betweentheliesbook.com