The Sharegiving Secret: How to Survive Family Caregiving

Ep 61: Caregiving without Self-Sacrifice: Kim Lackie on Stress, Boundaries, and the Body's Warnings

In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Kim Lackie about the hidden cost of caregiving and the importance of learning to pause before the body breaks down under stress. Kim brings a powerful blend of lived experience and professional insight. With a 26-year career in law enforcement and experience raising triplets, she understands what it means to live under pressure while caring for others. She explains how stress can show up as physical pain, exhaustion, reactivity, decision fatigue, and nervous-system overload. The conversation explores practical ways caregivers can begin restoring themselves in very small increments: five minutes of breathing, a quiet shower, a walk in nature, asking someone for thirty minutes of help, or pausing before reacting. Kim also discusses box breathing, emotional tracking, boundaries, unconscious patterning, and the importance of self-leadership. A central message emerges: caregiving may be a labor of love, but it should not require the caregiver to disappear. As Deborah and Kim discuss, caregivers need systems, support, boundaries, and a new way to measure energy before burnout becomes illness. KEY TOPICS * Caregiver burnout and survival mode * The mind-body connection * Physical pain as a stress signal * Box breathing and nervous system regulation * Asking for help without guilt * Boundaries and energy exchange * Decision fatigue * Unconscious patterning and people-pleasing * Self-leadership for caregivers * Community resources and practical support GUEST RESOURCE MENTIONED Kim Lackie offers The Path Forward, a resource focused on unconscious patterning, journal prompts, and self-leadership for making decisions from inner authority rather than old programming. Free for your audience: The Path Forward Workbook Link: https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton [https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton] Website Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/ [https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/] Facebook-Personal Profile-Kim Lackie: https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr [https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr] FB page-Sovereign Path Alchemy https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr [https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr] IG-Kim Lackie1: https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr] LinkedIn-Kim Lackie: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app [https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app] YouTube channel-Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq [https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq] In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Kim Lackie about the hidden cost of caregiving and the importance of learning to pause before the body breaks down under stress. Kim brings a powerful blend of lived experience and professional insight. With a 26-year career in law enforcement and experience raising triplets, she understands what it means to live under pressure while caring for others. She explains how stress can show up as physical pain, exhaustion, reactivity, decision fatigue, and nervous-system overload. The conversation explores practical ways caregivers can begin restoring themselves in very small increments: five minutes of breathing, a quiet shower, a walk in nature, asking someone for thirty minutes of help, or pausing before reacting. Kim also discusses box breathing, emotional tracking, boundaries, unconscious patterning, and the importance of self-leadership. A central message emerges: caregiving may be a labor of love, but it should not require the caregiver to disappear. As Deborah and Kim discuss, caregivers need systems, support, boundaries, and a new way to measure energy before burnout becomes illness. KEY TOPICS * Caregiver burnout and survival mode * The mind-body connection * Physical pain as a stress signal * Box breathing and nervous system regulation * Asking for help without guilt * Boundaries and energy exchange * Decision fatigue * Unconscious patterning and people-pleasing * Self-leadership for caregivers * Community resources and practical support GUEST RESOURCE MENTIONED Kim Lackie offers The Path Forward, a resource focused on unconscious patterning, journal prompts, and self-leadership for making decisions from inner authority rather than old programming. Free for your audience: The Path Forward Workbook Link: https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton [https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton] Website Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/ [https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/] Facebook-Personal Profile-Kim Lackie: https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr [https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr] FB page-Sovereign Path Alchemy https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr [https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr] IG-Kim Lackie1: https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr] LinkedIn-Kim Lackie: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app [https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app] YouTube channel-Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq [https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq]

The Hidden Crisis of Widowhood: Carol McGehe on Widows Fog, Purpose, and Living Forward

Widowhood is more than grief—it’s disorientation, invisibility, and loss of identity. Widow’s advocate Carol McGehe shares insights on “widows fog,” rebuilding purpose, and how community care transforms lives. Carol’s ministry, Living Forward, offers a compelling example of how structured compassion, social connection, and practical support can restore dignity, identity, and purpose. This episode is essential listening for caregivers, families, faith communities, and anyone seeking to better understand the emotional and practical realities of widowhood. Bio: CAROL McGEHE lives with her husband Larry in Daytona Beach, FL. Carol is the founder of The Vine Church’s Living Forward Ministry for Widows and consults to help others begin widows’ ministries in their local communities. She and Larry are co-authors of the award-winning Christian historical novel, In Search of My Heart, the first book in the In Search series. In addition to writing and serving as a Widows’ Advocate, Carol enjoys traveling, Bible Study, playing pickleball, boogie boarding, and spending time with friends. Website links and other social media: McGehe Books (Carol McGehe)_ “Becoming A Widows’ Advocate”: Website/ordering: McGeheBooks.com/Widows_Advocate/ Email: McGeheBooks@gmail.com McGehe Books (Larry & Carol McGehe)_ “In Search of My Heart”: Website/ordering: https://McGeheBooks.com Email: McGeheBooks@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/insearchseries YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@McGeheBooks Instagram: https://instagram.com/mcgehebooks #caregiving #thesharegivingsecret #widowsadvocate #DeborahSGreenhut #widows #postcaring

Ep 59 When Love Isn’t Enough: Why Caregivers Need a Plan

In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Ryan Riggins, a senior transition advisor, real estate professional, and creator of a caregiver-focused planning blueprint. Together, they explore one of the most overlooked truths in caregiving: 👉 Love does not create systems. Ryan shares practical, hard-won insights from working with families navigating housing transitions, financial decisions, and emotional resistance. From the first difficult conversation to protecting a family’s largest asset, this episode offers both clarity and caution. 📚 Guest Resources Section Website: rigginsstrategicsolutions.com Book: The Unheard Conversation Blueprint + calculators: https://www.rigginsstrategicsolutions.com/the-blueprint Senior Safe App (daily check-in + caregiver tools) https://www.rigginsstrategicsolutions.com/seniorsafe-app About Dr. Deborah Greenhut Author of The Rational Caregiver and host of The Sharegiving Secret, Dr. Greenhut helps individuals “learn to speak their life” through narrative. Deborah's guide for caregivers, "The Rational Caregiver" is available in print on Amazon and in e-format on Kindle. www.deborahgreenhut.com and www.memoirmomentum.com #Caregiving #Sharegiving #AgingParents #CaregiverSupport #NarrativeCompetence #TheSharegivingSecret-TM

Ep 58 When One Person Does It All: Why Caregiving Breaks Families

Why does caregiving so often become a one-person job? In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Nancy LeClair, founder of The Other Daughter, about the hidden dynamics that push caregiving onto a single family member—and the devastating emotional, financial, and relational consequences that follow. Drawing on Nancy’s background in market research, hospital and home care, and family mediation, this conversation explores: 1. Why families default to a “primary caregiver” model 2. How unshared care leads to burnout, resentment, and long-term family rifts 3. The ethical and financial realities of unpaid caregiving labor 4. Why neutral third parties can save families from turning on one another 5. The urgency of planning before crisis strikes This episode is a candid, compassionate look at why caregiving must be shared—and how families can begin having those conversations now. Nancy LeClair is the founder of The Other Daughter, a caregiving consulting practice that helps families navigate elder care without sacrificing relationships. With experience in hospital care, home care, and family mediation, Nancy advocates for proactive planning, fair distribution of caregiving labor, and the use of neutral third parties to prevent burnout and family fracture. Social Media: Website: www.theotherdaughter.ca LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/theotherdaughter [http://www.linkedin.com/in/theotherdaughter] Instagram: nleclairtheotherdaughter Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD is a speaker, author, educator, and three-time family caregiver devoted to helping caregivers create fairer, healthier ways of caring—without losing themselves in the process. Through storytelling and practical frameworks, she helps caregivers rethink boundaries, rebalance responsibilities, and reclaim wellbeing. She is the author of the Amazon bestselling book The Rational Caregiver and the host of the podcast The Sharegiving Secret, where honest conversations illuminate how care can be shared, sustainable, and humane. Deborah's book, The Rational Caregiver, is available on Amazon at this link [https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Caregiver-Protect-Finances-Quality/dp/B0CS9MQ2F8/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2UVC3HIDEBGMR&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.vRhs8AO6cjxlRx6lmihyU0YzJ5c6FbobWcx6VjuE6R3iE_atRzqysES9ELHNCHIKYmLT6Y4ZBK-GpgcEH1gveqKO5qXVNKJS7wXPMrarAtlmnrIv0IOH7mgV99MtmEqp2A6V2XxGQAxIRdaZMLun74EvkR36oZgqzLEv2dK--RP1upw164hsWetBTHBJ1NVKsrIs0uYUKKesSB6imf0wfq93a2RWXE_xzhfdyWB0sjg.pDzTRgU_-EasgiHWUv2Gb6XNdmGod2eC5K7hFw3Y-J0&dib_tag=se&keywords=the+rational+caregiver&qid=1774106712&sprefix=the+rational+caregiver%2Caps%2C116&sr=8-1] in both Kindle and Print formats. #TheSharegivingSecret #Caregiving #FamilyCaregiving #CaregiverBurnout #ElderCare #SandwichGeneration #InvisibleLabor #CaregivingSupport #ShareTheCare

Rhythmic Resilience: Caregiving Lessons from Musician Maritri Garrett | 005

In Memoriam 3-14-2026. The world lost a sonbird today. This episode is being rebroadcast in memory of our friend, Maritri Garrett. Her story: Jumping into caregiving transformed her life in ways she never expected! Chatting with Maritri Garrett, a musician turned caregiver, I dove deep into how she balances her creative passions with the demands of caring for her parentless nieces and her own parents during family crises. Maritri shares that self-care isn't just a nice-to-have; it's essential. Her story of adjusting life on the fly, incorporating rigorous self-care routines inspired by choreographer Twyla Tharp’s book, truly resonates with anyone in the throes of caregiving. If you’re finding caregiving to be a juggling act of emotional and physical demands, Maritri’s approach to maintaining her sanity through music, routine, and self-care is a testament to the power of resilience and creativity in the face of life’s unexpected turns. About Maritri: Maritri Garrett is a remarkable independent artist whose music reflects the depth of her diverse musical background. As a composer, multi-instrumentalist, singer, and educator, her songs tell honest stories of life, love, and loss, offering healing and solace to all who listen. Maritri holds a unique blend of academic achievements, including a Bachelor of Arts in Biology from Fisk University, a Bachelor of Science in Composition, and a Master of Fine Arts in Jazz Studies from Howard University. Her skillful versatility with instruments like the piano, guitar, bass, cello, and percussion sets her apart. Having performed with and opened for musical legends like Gladys Knight and Patti LaBelle, Maritri continues to captivate audiences with her emotionally powerful compositions and soulful performances. https://www.instagram.com/maritrimusic/ [https://www.instagram.com/maritrimusic/] https://www.tiktok.com/@maritrimusic [https://www.tiktok.com/@maritrimusic] https://www.threads.net/@maritrimusic [https://www.threads.net/@maritrimusic] https://www.facebook.com/MaritriMusic [https://www.facebook.com/MaritriMusic] https://www.facebook.com/maritri [https://www.facebook.com/maritri] About Me: I have cared for many family members across the life span, experiencing the joys and challenges of child-rearing, the poignance of caring for parents, friends, and elder partners. I realized that I could not handle the stress of family caregiving 24/7/365. It was time for a new approach to caring. My health and happiness were slipping away. This is how Think to Thrive for Caregivers evolved. Let your mind meet your heart so you don’t lose track of your life. Connect with Me: https://www.deborahgreenhut.com/ [https://www.deborahgreenhut.com/] https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborahgreenhut01/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborahgreenhut01/] Find my books here [https://www.amazon.com/stores/Deborah-S.-Greenhut/author/B001KI5BAU?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true] Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a comment in the section below! Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. You can also subscribe in your favorite podcast app. Leave us an Apple Podcasts review Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on Apple Podcasts, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on Apple Podcasts.