Camp Codger

A Codger is Gone

Goodbye, Richard Kipling Hi, I’m Gary Ebersole, welcoming you back to Camp Codger with an episode that I never wanted to record. This is a belated goodbye to Richard Kipling, co-founder of the Camp Codger podcast, who died recently after a stroke. He was the inspiration for two old guys like us venturing into the world of online broadcasting. One evening over dinner a few years ago, Richard declared, “We’ve got some good insights about getting old, and we should do a podcast.” For 72 weeks, we did just that with our co-host, Randy Schultz. Richard was one of my very best friends (it’s a small group since I’m not the most social animal), and his passing leaves a huge hole in my heart. I truly feel at a loss for words, which, as Richard would have noted, is not really a good thing for somebody trying to record a podcast. That said, a few things come to mind as I write these words. The first was a wise observation by Camp Codger listener Mike Riordan, a mutual friend of Richard and me. Mike reminds those of us mourning our dear friend that grief is the price we pay for loving so deeply. Mike also left me with the Japanese phrase “tomodachi wa eien desu” which means “friends are forever.” So very true, Mike. Thanks for the thoughts. I was also reminded of a short, illustrated excerpt from a 2012 radio interview Terry Gross recorded with children’s book author and illustrator Maurice Sendak. I discovered it when I was grieving the loss of my first wife, and its poignancy still brings me to tears. In the interview, Sendak tells Terry that he loves life but was at peace with aging and dying. He says that the hardest part of getting old is losing friends. In his words, “I cry a lot because I miss people. I cry a lot because they die, and I can’t stop them. They leave me, and I love them more.” I know how Sendak feels about losing friends. It was a powerful, moving conversation. The video excerpt is only five minutes and is well worth watching. I posted the link below, and also in the episode show notes. I used to think that the idea that my world would grow smaller as I aged was a cliché. I was wrong. My world is smaller now. Good-bye, Richard. I’ll miss you. Link to the Terry Gross interview with Maurice Sendak: https://www.nytimes.com/video/magazine/100000001970456/an-illustrated-talk-with-maurice-sendak.html [https://www.nytimes.com/video/magazine/100000001970456/an-illustrated-talk-with-maurice-sendak.html]

Allow-Accept-Adapt

Getting Old Isn't for Sissies Gary discovered that a few weeks ago when he was faced with the constraints of aging. He came up with a mantra for dealing with getting old after the reality of hiking up Picacho Peak almost proved too much for his 76-year-old body.

Dirty Harry—Life Coach

A dinner table discussion for seniors—an “organ recital” and talk of falling In this episode, Gary tells listeners about a dinner with friends that started with the usual "ills and pills" discussion and closed with the premise that Dirty Harry (Clint Eastwood) might have some good advice for seniors dealing with slowly diminishing capabilities. A fun evening with some interesting insights.

Returning to the Land of the Very Old

Sam Toperoff died this year, and that makes me really sad. I never met Sam, but as all good writers do with their readers, he created a connection. I felt I knew him as a friend after reading his essay In The Land of the Very Old. There are no geographical coordinates for this strange place. It’s a state of mind Sam conjured up about aging. In this sweet piece of writing, he describes his journey from living in the “old country” to his new home in the “land of the very old.” Last March, I posted a podcast episode recommending Sam’s essay to Camp Codger listeners. While preparing the podcast, I reached out to Sam, asking his permission to use a photo he took at his home in the French Alps, where he lived with his wife, daughter, and grandson. Sam never replied, but I assumed he would be okay with it since the episode was about Sam and his essay. A few weeks ago, I became curious about what Sam was up to and discovered the sad news…Sam was no longer with us. It matters to me because I’m approaching “the land of the very old,” and he was a guide. I’m not at the border yet, but I can see it in the distance. Thanks to Sam’s depiction, the “land of the very old” seems like a good place. Not perfect, of course, but, as he says using a bittersweet chocolate simile for the “land of the very old,“ “the bitter is really not so terribly bitter, the sweet, when it comes, is surely a good deal sweeter than it has ever been.” With his first essay about his new life in the “land of the very old,” Sam made a connection with thousands of readers. The response by his new friends, hundreds of who responded with emails, caused him to write a follow-up essay. In the Land of the Very Old, Part 2, which was published after his death, Sam continues his story about residing in this strange new place. And he must have been planning on keeping the conversation open since he even suggested he was getting a visa to the “land of the very, very old” as he was approaching his 91st birthday. I was moved by Sam Toperoff’s passing because he was an inspiration. Not headline-news inspiration about a random old person doing some impossible feat for an 80-year-old. No, Sam inspired me because he continued to keep doing what he loved and did so well. At 90, he was still creating and writing, even as he was aware of the creeping limitations that make everything just a bit harder as we grow older. I continue to do this podcast at 76 because Sam is showing me the way. Thanks, Sam. We never met, but I’ll miss you. I was looking forward to your take on your life in the Land of the Very, Very Old. I know it would have been a good read and a pretty good place to be. Thanks for listening. I encourage you to read Sam’s essays. They’re long but worth the time. The links are below. In the Land of the Very Old [https://sundaylongread.com/2024/01/23/in-the-land-of-the-very-old/] In the Land of the Very Old, Part 2 [https://sundaylongread.com/2024/07/02/sam-toperoff-very-old-part-2/] CONNECT WITH US Would you like to know when the co-hosts of Camp Codger get together to talk about a new topic? Subscribe [https://www.campcodger.com/subscribe/] to our weekly Camp Codger newsletter to receive an email notification each time we publish a new episode. You can also subscribe and listen on your favorite podcast app [https://www.campcodger.com/subscribe/]. And, if you enjoyed this episode about Returning to the Land of the Very Old, please click the Share button below and Like Camp Codger on our Facebook Page [https://www.facebook.com/CampCodger]. Finally, have some feedback for the old codgers? Leave a comment below or send an email to campcodger@gmail.com [campcodger@gmail.com?subject=Hey,%20Old%20Codgers!]. [http://mailto] https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/camp-codger/id1641755787 https://open.spotify.com/show/2Qi8lQkOiapRHWAMTZI4kr https://www.youtube.com/@CampCodger

The Prostate Papers—Chapter 8: Healthcare Billing Insanity

Gary returns with an episode about receiving an insane EOB (Explanation of Benefits) from United HealthCare. Today, it’s a rant, but I promise to make it a short tirade. The trigger? My latest EOB statement from my healthcare insurance company. To be honest, I seldom download and open these statements. I’m a big fan of Medicare and have a really good Advantage plan thanks to my late wife’s retirement program. Until this year, I have had the good fortune of being relatively healthy—no major illnesses or chronic medical issues. I typically incur few medical expenses, and it never costs me more than a small copayment for any procedure. My healthcare insurance company? UnitedHealthCare. Yes, the purported Darth Vader of the healthcare insurance evil empire. REALLY? A QUARTER OF A MILLION DOLLARS? On to my rant. So, I opened this new statement and was blown away by the year-to-date numbers it presented. The top line was enormous. My providers—the labs, imaging facilities, clinics, and doctors who delivered services—billed UnitedHealthcare over $256,000 from January to October. I know I was diagnosed and treated for prostate cancer, which isn’t cheap, but a quarter of a million dollars? I might add that I did not spend one night in a hospital or have an operation in a surgical facility. Now, the relevant numbers were the actual payments to the providers and my share of the costs. UnitedHealthCare paid a bit under $33,00, 13% of the billed amount. My out-of-pocket share was an incredibly small $521. This begs the question about what kind of screwed-up system, knowingly and with a straight face, bills anywhere from five to eighty times the negotiated cost of a medical procedure? Every provider knew precisely what they would get paid by my Medicare insurance company before they submitted the claims. These are pre-authorized payments, yet they still billed these egregious amounts. Why did a urologist bill over $23,000 for a 15-minute, in-office procedure, knowing they would get paid $279? BUT WHO PAYS THE BALANCE? As I noted, I have the good fortune to have a decent Medicare Advantage plan that pays for almost everything. My concern is for the poor patient who sees an enormous unpaid balance and wonders if they will be required to cover it. Sure, there’s a note in the EOB saying you should not be billed for the balance, followed by another notation that the patient may need to pay a copayment, coinsurance, or deductible. So, am I on the hook or not? No wonder there is so much anxiety today around medical treatment and its costs. In my humble opinion, the medical-industrial complex of healthcare providers and insurance companies maintains this evil pricing charade to take advantage of the disadvantaged. These obscenely inflated prices are the starting point for unfortunate patients who may be underinsured or even uninsured. How many families have lost homes or gone bankrupt based on their inability to pay these fantastical prices? Explaining the complexities of the healthcare payment system is way above my pay grade. Still, these thoroughly confusing payment practices can partially explain the anti-healthcare sentiment rampant in our country. And we haven’t even touched on the burden of self-advocacy placed on patients dealing with complex medical issues. Or the simple frustration of just trying to ask their healthcare provider a simple question. Leave a MyChart message? No response. Call the office? Listen to a long phone tree before being sent to voicemail. Leave a voicemail message? Ignored. As you can probably tell, I’ve dealt with a few challenges over the last nine months. A COSTLY BUREAUCRACY My tirade was triggered by a stunning Explanation of Benefits statement from UnitedHealthCare, but it’s just the tip of the iceberg. The problem lies with the stifling medical bureaucracy that has evolved over the decades, driven by the belief that we can solve all our problems by injecting free market principles. In my view, the unfettered profit motive embraced by the medical-industrial complex has distorted healthcare delivery. I believe healthcare is a fundamental human right, and we have to fix this incredibly complex problem. I don’t have any simple answers. I’m just a patient caught up in a complex system, but I will close with something I do know—cold-blooded, cowardly murder will not solve our problems with healthcare. Period. CONNECT WITH US Would you like to know when the co-hosts of Camp Codger get together to talk about a new topic? Subscribe [https://www.campcodger.com/subscribe/] to our weekly Camp Codger newsletter to receive an email notification each time we publish a new episode. You can also subscribe and listen on your favorite podcast app [https://www.campcodger.com/subscribe/]. And, if you enjoyed this episode about healthcare billing insanity, please click the Share button below and Like Camp Codger on our Facebook Page [https://www.facebook.com/CampCodger]. Finally, have some feedback for the old codgers? Leave a comment below or send an email to campcodger@gmail.com [campcodger@gmail.com?subject=Hey,%20Old%20Codgers!]. [http://mailto] https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/camp-codger/id1641755787 https://open.spotify.com/show/2Qi8lQkOiapRHWAMTZI4kr https://www.youtube.com/@CampCodger